Dark Skies (2013) Review

Right off the bat it was not hard to tell that this was going to be a mediocre movie. The biggest give-away has to be the fact that this is a horror film – a genre that as of late has been producing only slightly higher quality content than a homeless man urinating up a wall.

A true visionary.

It’s a sad state of affairs, because there is nothing more satisfying than being truly scared by a movie. Okay, yeah, some films are startling and will make you jump, but that’s not the same – especially considering you can get the same effect by just browsing the internet regularly. Horror movies have a great chance to engross you in their world, to envelope you with a dark and tense atmosphere, to make you paranoid, afraid – but instead they squander that by trying to make you brown-up your pants with a cheap tactic that a little jackass 8 year old could pull off.

“lol scared u”

Dark Skies follows the Barret family, or as they will be referred to in this review: “That horror movie family.” (You know the one, the quaint little family of four – made up of average everyday suburban American parents, and a couple outcast or disturbed children – one or both of whom usually have some kind of curse or ailment inflicted upon them.) Strange things start happening to That horror movie family (as they tend to), which leads them to believe that some kind of evil or dark force is trying to hurt them in some way. It eventually comes to light that the evil force is actually after one of their children. Wow – Who saw that coming?

This plot is getting recycled like nobodies business lately – the basic foundation is used in The Haunting in Conneticut, Paranormal Activity 2, Insidious Dark Skies is essentially the bastard offspring of the three.

lel

The whole film plays like a poor man’s Insidious – It’s basically the same film except instead of Demons pissing everybody off, it’s Aliens. The plot seems to follow the same basic footsteps, the characters are all very similar, and the overall feel of the film is nearly identical – although Dark Skies is considerably less scary.

The acting is all right, as usual the child actors are about as convincing as a white transit van with the word “Candy” written on the side in red paint – although they can hardly be blamed for that, since they are kids. The adult actors aren’t that much better really, but their performances are no worse than what you would expect from a typical horror flick.

Okay, maybe not in THIS picture...

Mark Watson + Jon Lajoie = ???

The sounds and visuals are also all right – nothing special, akin to most other modern ‘horror’ films. The CGI is probably the absolute low point of the visuals, but other than that, it’s acceptable.

The real kicker to this film is just the flat out stupidity that goes on within it. Like in most horror films, the dad is a sceptic,  immediately disregarding any crazy theories despite all of the unexplainable shit that is happening to him and no matter how much evidence supports the theory. This is a device that most films to use to pad the story out a little, to create a conflict of some kind, but it’s just frustrating to watch them disregard a possible idea just because: “lol its probably nothing.” The film relies heavily on character stupidity to push the plot forwards honestly. “the aliens are after my kids, the expert told us to stick together as a unit – lol, lets split up and lock the kids alone in a dark room!”

The movie overall is just very so-so. It’s just another boring “it cud hapn 2 u” American horror to add to the pile – which was long ago promoted to a mountain. Sure, the film will make you jump occasionally, but that’s not really a point in its favour. If you’re looking for a few little thrills, and not much depth or horror, this film is worth checking out – unless you’ve seen Insidious, in which case don’t bother.

Verdict: Like realising that absolutely delicious meal you just ate has given you the squirts (4/10)

My face when watching:

1349985655106

Image 1 Credit
Image 2 Credit

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5 responses to “Dark Skies (2013) Review

    • They’re all horror movies though, in that they intend to scare the audience. It doesn’t matter what the subject matter is, their core goal is to scare.

      Plus, IMDb says it’s a horror, and I’m the kind of hardcore researcher who takes that for gospel.

      • ok lets have a little definition check according to the wiki:”Science fiction is a genre of fiction with imaginative but more or less plausible content such as settings in the future, futuristic science and technology, space travel, parallel universes, ALIENS, and paranormal abilities” – well Dark Skies is about Aliens so how is that NOT SCI-FI? I take what IMDB tell me with a pinch of salt most times they have no clue what they talk about …..

        • So first you slate IMDb’s lack of credible information, then you go on to quote Wikipedia? For the record, shall I check the definition of horror on Wiki, while we’re there? “Horror is a film genre seeking to elicit a negative emotional reaction from viewers by playing on the audience’s primal fears. Horror films often feature scenes that startle the viewer” – sounds a lot like Dark Skies.

          I’m not saying you’re wrong, it is a sci-fi – but it’s also a horror. Sci-fi-Horrors do exist. Plus, they totally marketed this as a classic horror, just look at the poster and plot summary.

  1. This picture that was posted is just to make people believe that there will be a followup. Try to get attention in another way, even a 5 year old can see that something is wrong with the picture… And by putting on jessie’s face on to the one that is there. The original is insidious, not so hard to see that it’s written Dark Skies 2 with a pen for tab/phone or on a PC. Find a better hobby 😉

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